Saturday, December 26, 2015



It is Sunday, December 27and there are only 364 days (next year is a leap year) until Christmas.  If you are careful you can get some good bargains for next Christmas.  Just be sure to leave notes so you remember what you got and where you put it.  Today we remember the birthdays of Johann Arndt, Louis Pasteur and Tovah Feldshuh.  On this day in 1825 the first public railroad using a steam locomotive was completed in England, in 1900 Carrie Nation made her first public smashing of a bar (Hotel Carry Annex Bar, Wichita, KS) and in 1932 Radio City Music Hall opened.  In Bhutan it is the Day of 9 Evils, in Indonesia it is Independence Day and in Namibia and South Africa it is Family Day.

I hope everyone had a great Christmas or other holiday.  I know we did.  The lovely Elaine and I did the traditional Italian seafood dinner on Christmas Eve.  It was not without its problems; however.  The biggest issue was the stuffed clams.  Usually we buy frozen stuffed clams.  This year we were unable to find them in our supermarket.  The manager of the seafood area said that they did not get any this year.  We checked several other stores in the area and no one had them.  I had to go back to our old stomping grounds for a doctor’s appointment, so I stopped in our old supermarket to see if they had them.  The seafood department manager told me that the company had discontinued the item.

I was distressed as this was an item we always looked forward to having.  When I got home, I decided to contact the company and express my disappointment.  Surprisingly, they responded the following day.  Even more surprising was the fact that they claimed the product was not discontinued.  The woman who responded even told me of two food chains where I could get them.  Unfortunately, one chain has no stores in NJ and the other has no stores anywhere near here.  She also indicated that our local chain should have them and I should ask if they could special order them.  I did and they claim that they were told that the item had been discontinued.

I e-mailed back and told her what our store was being told.  She assured me again that the item was not discontinued and would address the miscommunication issue.  She also said that she hoped that would help.  This was on Wednesday, the 23rd.  I pointed out that it would not, because even if they placed the order the chances were good that they would not arrive in time for me to have them on Christmas Eve.  I ended up buying fresh clams and making them myself.  They were good, a little dry, but good.  However, there was a lot more effort involved than there would have been if I could have just put the frozen ones in the oven.  Hopefully they will have this worked out by next year.  The only other issue we had was that to get the seventh type of fish we had to use Peppridge Farm Goldfish crackers.  I hope that counts.

In one respect I am happy to have Christmas behind us.  Now that the holiday has passed, we will no longer be subjected to some of the awful commercials that come out every year.  Car commercials are the worst.  There is one that would have us believe that Santa does all his work in a fleet of the company’s cars.  There are several that want us to believe that people are out buying cars and putting big red bows on them as gifts.  I was out driving around on Christmas day and I did not see one driveway with a car with a big red bow on it.

There is one company that has young people riding along in their cars singing the song the commercial is using and laughing and having a great time.  That is one of the most unrealistic ones.  Have you ever seen a car with four people in it?  The driver is driving with a bored look on his face while the other people in the car look at their phone.  No one is singing, no one is laughing, no one is even talking.  I would bet that if the car stopped at a traffic light and one of the passengers got out, the others would probably not even notice.

So the Christmas commercials are over and now we can get to the ones where you resolve to buy a new car before the end of the year, or make a resolution to buy jewelry for your loved one, or any of the other inane commercials they gear toward New Year’s Eve.  Of course once we get past those we can start gearing up for when Valentine’s Day cars and jewelry are being pushed and when George Washington and Abraham Lincoln start trying to get us to buy cars, jewelry, clothing, trips, etc.
The worst part of the next few days will be the wrap up shows that will proliferate in the coming week.  Why do we have to have this every year?  We get the top newsmakers, the best shows of the year, the 10 best of just about everything and on and on.  The one that always gets me is the Funniest Commercials show each year.  One of the things that makes me crazy when I am watching a show is how they run several minutes of commercials after only 9 or 10 minutes of show.  Now they want me to watch a show of commercials that they will break up with – commercials.  I’m probably going to skip that one.

This week our fact tells us that the book “Green Eggs ‘n’ Ham” only contains 50 different words.

I waited while you went and counted them.  I know that some of you did, or will after you finish reading this.

I would like to wish everyone a happy, healthy, exciting New Year!  I hope 2016 is a year filled with joy, family and friends, laughter, love and fewer Republican presidential candidates.  Happy New Year!

Saturday, December 19, 2015



It is Sunday, December 20 and there are only 5 more days until Christmas!  By now you should have the presents wrapped and hidden away so that you forget where some of them are and don’t find them until Easter.  Today we remember the birthdays of Giovanni Battista Gagliano, John Geary and Alan Parsons.  On this day in 69 General Vespasianus occupied Rome, in 1803 the Louisiana Purchase formally transferred the territory from France to the US for $27 million and in 1984 33 unknown Bach keyboard works were found in the Yale library.  In Taiwan it is Bank Holiday and this past Friday was Underdog Day worldwide.

Underdog Day does not refer to the cartoon figure.  Originally, an underdog was a shipbuilder who stood in a dark pit and helped to saw planks of wood from beneath while the overdog, a supervisor of sorts, sawed the planks from above.  The underdog got all dirty and covered in sawdust, yet the overdog got all of the credit for the hard work carried out.  The first recorded uses of the term occurred in the second half of the nineteenth century; its first meaning was “the beaten dog in a fight”.  An “underdog bet” was a bet on the underdog for which the odds were always considerably higher.  Established by Peter Moeller in 1976, Underdog Day is the time to honor all of life’s unrecognized hard-workers.  So, I hope all you underdogs had a great day.  This day is normally recognized on the third Friday in December.  Just so you don’t miss it again, next year the date is December 16.  Mark your calendars.

It is finally over!  The final hurdle has been jumped and we are no longer under the shadow of our old house.  The town has completed the inspections and has issued the CO.  Believe me when I say it has not been easy.  This all started back a number of months ago.  We were gearing up to close on the new house and I thought we should get the CO inspection done on our old house just to get it out of the way.  I contacted the town and they scheduled an inspection.  I foolishly expected everything to go well.

The inspector showed up, walked around the outside, came in and walked around the inside and then told me I could get the official report in a couple days.  A few days later I went to town hall and got the report.  We had failed for a variety of reasons.  One reason was that I had to have CFI outlets installed in the kitchen, bathroom and basement laundry area.  No problem.  I also had to replace a section of dryer vent hose, again no problem.  The problems were on the outside of the house.  Apparently, he walked around the house, noting anything that appeared to be a DIY project.  When he went back to the office he looked to see if there were permits for those projects.  If not, he used that as a reason to fail us.

Some 30 years ago, I built a deck in our yard.  At the time I did not bother with a permit, never thinking that it might be a problem later.  They gave me a sheet listing the current specs for a deck, showing that the requirements had been updated only four years ago.  I asked why I was expected to meet these specs.  He explained that it was because I did not have a permit.  I asked if they were going to all the houses with decks built a number of years ago and making them upgrade and he just looked at me as if I had started speaking a foreign language.  He pointed out, for example, that I had two 2X8 header boards and I should have three.  I said, “So if I go and add a third 2X8 board that will be okay?”  I got that look again.

I decided not to push that anymore and went on to the next problem.  There was an issue with the electrical work for the hot tub.  I told him that I had a permit for the electrical work and he said that it was for service to the house but not the hot tub.  I said, “So I have a problem because your office didn’t complete the paperwork properly?”  I got that look, again.  They also questioned the deck for the hot tub.  The guy told me that they needed to be sure that it could hold the weight of the tub.  I pointed out that it had been there for eight years.  “Don’t you think I would have had a problem by now, if it wasn’t strong enough?”  You guessed it – the look.

Another issue was the railing on the front steps of the house.  I asked what the problem was and he explained that a six inch sphere could fit through there.  I looked at him for a minute and then said, “Yeah, so?”  He pointed out that a child could stick their head in there.  I pointed out that if he could stick his head in there he could take it back out.  Again the look.  It has become apparent to me that the people in that office do not use or understand logic.  Back to the deck, after some frustrating discussion regarding the deck I stated that it sounded like he was telling me to tear it down.  He was quick to point out that that was not what he was saying.  I said, “Then I can just leave it alone and it will be okay?”  He said he wasn’t saying that either.  I asked what he was saying.  He gave me the look for a couple seconds and then said, “Are there any other questions?”

I realize that I had promised a major tirade on this whole thing, but frankly, I am just glad to have it done.  I am sure you get the gist of the frustrations involved in dealing with these people.  If not, start a project at your house and have the town inspectors get involved.  In talking with other people about this, it seems that they are the same everywhere.  The end result was that I had to have both decks removed.  The contractor explained that it would cost five times more to fix them than it would to tear them down.
When I decided to have them taken down I asked the town if I needed a permit and if I didn’t get one would they make me rebuild it.  They really have no sense of humor.  Of course, once the deck was down I had to have a stairway built because of the door that was there.  What made it worse was that the landing had to be wide enough for the whole sliding door, even though only half the door opened.  I am just glad that the whole thing is done.

This week our fact tells us that the average adult male grows one pound of facial hair in ten years.  I am way ahead of that with facial hair, I think.  If you add in nose hair and ear hair, I probably do a pound every six months.

I would like to take this opportunity to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas!  Regardless of what holiday you celebrate, this is a season of joy, happiness, love, family and friends.  Take a moment to appreciate what you have and let your family and friends know that you love and appreciate them.  Have a very happy holiday.

Saturday, December 12, 2015



It is Sunday, December 13 and there are only 12 days until Christmas.  Time to get the guar gum and polysorbate so that your cookies will last until March.  Today we remember the birthdays of Mary Todd Lincoln, Carlos Montoya and Dick Van Dyke.  On this day in 863 Boudouin with the Iron Arm wed Charles de Kale’s daughter Judith (I didn’t even know they were dating), in 1843 “A Christmas Carol” by Charles Dickens published, 6,000 copies sold, and in 1969 Arlo Guthrie released “Alice’s Restaurant.”  In Malta it is Republic Day and in Upper Volta it is National Day.

Still no word from the old home, so I am not sure if they have gotten the CO or not.  I have e-mailed the buyer, but have not heard back yet.  I would assume that if there was a problem he would let me know.  I guess no news is … no news.  I will keep after it and hopefully everything will work out.  I just want this last piece to fall into place so that we can truly be finished with the whole deal.

We were out on the road the other night and there was construction going on (where isn’t there road work going on lately) and I noticed, from some distance away, that they had lights set up.  I know that they need light to see to do the work at night.  I understand that.  However, unless the work is being done by the astronauts in the space station, do the lights have to be that bright?  Plus, the work is being done in a lane that is closed to traffic.  Why do the lights have to shine in the eyes of the drivers in the other lanes?  I was just wondering.

While we were out, I also noticed something else that I thought was amusing.  We were driving along the road and saw a McDonald’s.  What I thought was funny was that directly across the road was an urgent medical care facility.  The question then becomes who came first?  Did the McDonald’s come first and then the medical facility?  Did the medical place set up there intentionally, thinking it would be amusing?  Was the medical place first and McDonald’s opened without looking around?  Either way, I thought it was funny.  

I am noticing more and more that people are lazy and I mean LAZY!  It is especially noticeable in supermarket parking lots.  If I had a nickel for every time I started to pull into a parking place and had to stop because someone left their cart there, I would have enough nickels to make my pants droop.  Seriously!  Because it is an issue, I decided to start watching people and observing their habits.  One of the benefits of being retired is that I have the time to do that.  I also spend a considerable amount of time running back and forth to the supermarket because we have run out of something or forgot to get something that we needed … but I digress.

As I was saying, I have had the opportunity to observe people and see how they handle their carts.  Keep in mind that this issue is not restricted to older people.  It is a problem with all age brackets.  Well, not all brackets.  Pre-teens are not that big a problem, but they can be … digressing again.  I have seen people come out of the store, go to their cars, unload their groceries and then push the cart into the nearest empty parking space.  I have seen people unload their cart and then leave it behind the car next to them.  I have seen them push the cart down the side of their car, just to get it out of their way.

Two of the worst were two people I saw the other day.  As I was coming into the lot, I watched a young woman pushing an empty cart toward the store.  I thought that she had taken one of the many carts strewn about the parking lot to use for shopping.  Wrong!  When she got to the end of the row of cars she gave the cart a big shove and let it roll across to the front of the store.  She didn’t even look to see if it made it all the way over.  She just pushed it, turned and walked back to her car.  The other one I saw loaded his groceries into the car, left the cart in the middle of the empty space next to him and drove off.  What makes this bad is that the space where he left it was right next to the cart drop off.  Five extra steps and he would have been able to put the cart there instead.  I could see this if it was 100 degrees out and they had a bag full of ice cream, but it wasn’t and I am pretty sure they didn’t.

The height of lazy that I witnessed recently was not directly related to a cart.  As I was entering the store I saw a woman coming out riding one of those electric carts.  Walking with her was a young man.  When she got out of the store she parked the cart got up and started to walk away.  The young man said, “I don’t know why you ride that cart when we come here.  You don’t need it and you are not handicapped.”  Her response was, “I ride it because I don’t feel like walking through the whole store.  The carts are there, why shouldn’t I ride one?”  I did not hear his response and I am pretty sure she did not want to hear mine.

So, in the future, walk your cart to the proper drop off spot.  It will make it easier for others to park, it will make it simpler for employees to collect them and the exercise is good for you.  This has been a public service announcement.  Thank you.

This week our fact tell us that 27% of female lottery winners hid their winning ticket in their bras.  So maybe guys are just trying to get to the ticket so they could have some cash to take the girl out for a nice dinner.  Maybe …

Saturday, December 5, 2015



It is Sunday, December 6 and there are only 19 days until Christmas.  Get that butter softened and those cookies in the oven!  Today we remember the birthdays of Orazio Tiberio Vecchi, Paul Friedrich Struck and Steven Wright.  On this day in 1492 Christopher Columbus discovered Haiti, in 1768 the first edition of the “Encyclopedia Brittanica” was published and in 1971 Lewis Franklin Powell was confirmed as a Supreme Court justice.

First let me say that I have not forgotten about giving you the lowdown on all the foolishness we went through trying to sell our house.  I just have not gotten the word on whether or not the new owners have gotten the final CO yet.  I will check and let you all know.

Next let me say that I am sick of turkey for a while.  I have had the main meal on Thanksgiving, leftovers, turkey soup made from the carcass, turkey sandwiches and turkey casserole.  ENOUGH!  Don’t misunderstand.  I enjoy turkey and look forward to having it every November.  But you can overdo a good thing.  Every year we all (that is a general we, not specific to my family) sit and enjoy the meal and then ask, “This is such a great meal.  Why do we only have it once a year?”

There are a couple reasons.  One is like I mentioned last week.  It takes a lot of effort to prepare a meal that is finished in 30 minutes.  The other is that we end up eating the leftovers for days after and become tired of turkey.  When we can no longer stand it, we toss out what is left and vow not to eat turkey again for at least a year.  It is like all the other traditional meals we have for holidays.  They are a great idea as the holiday approaches, but a pile of stuff in containers in the refrigerator that are starting to smell and that no one wants any more of after the big day.

I keep telling the lovely Elaine that we should get take-out containers and send the stuff home with everyone like goodie bags.  She gives me the look, but each year I think she is getting closer to considering it.  I think what we should do is not eat it as leftovers.  Instead we should freeze the stuff and break it out in February when we are sitting around wondering what we should have for dinner and the snow is too deep to run to the store for something or to go pick up a pizza somewhere.  

One of the things that I think would be handy would be to buy one of those food saver vacuum things.  They sell all different types and models and I think they are a good idea.  These things allow you to take food, vacuum all the air out and save it in the freezer for months.  This would be a good deal for the turkey I mentioned earlier.  One of the benefits is that the food would be usable in a couple months.  Not like what we do now.

Our current practice is to take the food and put it into those freezer storage bags.  We go through a variety of maneuvers to try and get all the air out before sealing the bag.  For the most part they do not work completely.  As a result, a month or so down the road, we are trying to decide what our menu will be for the next few days.  The lovely Elaine asks me what we have in the freezer.  I look and see that we have a lump of frost covered meat that the information written on the bag claims is chicken, another frost lump that is pork and yet another that we forgot to label and have no idea what it is.  The one thing they have in common is that they all end up in the garbage.

The benefit to the food saver device is that we would be able to actually use some of the stuff we have frozen.  It would also mean that we were throwing less meat away, leaving room in the garbage for the containers of vegetables that we put in the refrigerator, which end up being pushed to the back where we can forget about them until they become a science project, and begin to make the refrigerator smell.

As a side note, I am not positive that the commas belong where I put them, but I inserted them to allow you to breathe while reading that last sentence.

Back to the subject of food saving, we had a vacuum food machine some time back.  It was a small battery operated, hand-held device that worked with special bags.  It was a very simple operation.  You put the food in a special zip lock bag and closed it up.  The bag had an opening that you placed the device over.  When you turned it on, it pulled the air out of the bag, the hole sealed itself and your food was saved.  We had it for a couple months and every time we used it we marveled at how great it was.  It was not that big and fit in our cabinet.  The bags came in a box and were easy to store.

There was only one problem with the whole thing – they stopped making the bags and we could no longer get them.  If we decide to buy one of these new devices, I just hope they continue to make the bags for a few years.  I would hate to go to the trouble of buying one, finding a place to keep it and then have to get rid of it because they don’t sell supplies for it anymore.

This week we have two facts that are connected – 1) tells us that most brands of lipstick are tinted with extract from the cochineal insect and 2) tells us that most lipstick contains fish scales.  And the lovely Elaine wonders why I get so upset when she gets lipstick on my coffee cup when she takes a sip of my Starbucks.  It is quite simple, insect juice and fish scales do not go well with coffee.