It is Sunday, November 30 and there are only 25 days until Christmas!  I know!  Where has the time gone?  It seems like only 340 days ago it was Christmas and here we are with less than a month to go until it is here again.  And yes, for those of you who are wondering, the lovely Elaine is finally allowing me to play Christmas music.  Today we remember the birthdays of Andrea Doria, Samuel Clemons and Abbie Hoffman.  On this day in 1782, Great Britain signed the agreement recognizing US independence, in 1907 Pike Place Market was dedicated in Seattle and in 1954 the first meteorite (8 lbs) known to strike a person hit Liz Hodges of Sylacauga, AL.  In Barbados it is Independence Day, in the Philippines it is Bonifacio Day/Heroes’ Day and in Massachusetts it is John F Kennedy Day.

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving.  We did!  The kids came up and brought their new puppy.  She, Chloe, is a cutie and was well behaved.  She is only around 9 or 10 weeks old and has learned quite a bit under the tutelage of my daughter-in-law.  The lovely Elaine claims it is because Chloe is a girl.  I don’t necessarily subscribe to that theory, but she seems to be learning things faster than the boy dogs they have had.  But I digress …

Anyway, we had turkey, green beans, corn, mashed and sweet potatoes, dressing and gravy and, at the request of my younger grandson, we also had steamed broccoli.  For those of you who are interested, there is a difference between stuffing and dressing.  Stuffing is cooked inside the turkey, while dressing is cooked separately.  We started defrosting our turkey back on Halloween and by Wednesday night it was almost ready.  Yes, I got the parts out, including the bag they hide in the bird.  

We started cooking it early Thursday morning and it was ready only about 40 minutes after we had planned to eat.  We are getting better at this meal, after all these years.  I still need to learn the proper way to carve the turkey.  I get the meat off the turkey and on platters, but it looks more like one of the bodies from the chainsaw massacre movies than it does the ones you see in the commercials and cookbooks.  I suppose it doesn’t matter, as long as the meat gets to the table, but I will never be able to have a Norman Rockwell type photo of me bringing the turkey to the table.

Of course, I’m not sure I want the turkey brought to the table.  First, there would not be much room, so I do not know where I would put it.  Second would be the problem with all the juice running out of it.  We would probably need a drop cloth under the table and everyone would have to wear a pancho to stay dry.  Not an attractive holiday image.  I guess I will just continue to hack the bird up and throw the meat on platters.

After consuming the main course, the table was cleared and everyone adjourned to the living room, where the seating was softer.  I got the coffee going and started putting out the dessert items.  We had pumpkin pie, pumpkin cheese pie, apple pie, Tassies, chocolate cake, figs and candy.  The desserts took up as much table space as the meal.  One side note that some might find amusing (I did not) came when I was baking the pumpkin cheese pie.  The time came to mix the ricotta cheese into the pumpkin and I had about ¾ of the container in with the pumpkin when I realized I was putting in sour cream and not the cheese.

I proudly exhibited my ability to swear , loudly, and then dumped it all in the trash.  It was Wednesday afternoon and I now had to run to the store to get more pumpkin pie filling so that I could make the pie.  I also had to get a replacement for the sour cream.  It was fortunate for the people in the store that I had a few minutes by myself in the car.  That gave me the time needed to finish venting.  When I got to the store, I relatively calmly got what I needed and went home.  I was very careful to make sure I was using the ricotta cheese the second time.  The worst part of the whole thing was that there was nothing to blame this on.  I made the mistake.  I was not paying attention.  There were no mislabeled containers, no errors in the recipe, no one else to blame – I made the mistake.  Mark this day because I do not usually admit to stupidity.  Usually there is a way to push the blame off on someone or something else.  

Moving quickly along, I want to spend some time discussing Black Friday.  There was an article in our paper the other day, talking about some people who were camped out in a parking lot, since Tuesday, so that they could be first in line when the store opened on Thursday evening.  One of the people would not let the paper use his name because he was supposed to be at work.  Are the deals really so good that you would jeopardize your job to be first in line?  Do you dislike turkey and your family so much that you would rather camp out in a parking lot for several days?

They claim that you can get better deals by waiting until Cyber Monday and shopping on line for what you need.  Many places do not charge for shipping, depending on the size of the order.  But even if you have to pay for shipping, it has to be better than spending those nights camping (especially Wednesday during the storm) and taking the chance of losing your job.  Even better, you could wait a week or two and the deals will start so that merchants can get rid of their stock.  And there is far less chance of being trampled at 6 AM by people rushing to get one of the three items in the store that everyone wants.  I’m just saying …

This week our fact tells us that Donald Duck comics were banned in Finland because he didn’t wear pants.  They apparently didn’t have a problem with the fact that Daisy didn’t wear a skirt.  They also didn’t have an issue with Donald raising his three nephews (am I the only one who wonders where their parents are?).  Their only problem was with his lack of pants.  Maybe a family will buy jeans for him like that family in the stupid Pillsbury commercial bought for the dough boy.

By the way, Thanksgiving is over so don’t forget to button your pants.

Today is Sunday, November 23 and there are only 32 days until Christmas.  With Black Friday coming this week, you should have already staked out your spots and gotten your tents set up to be ready to be trampled at your local Target or Walmart.  Today we remember the birthdays of Prospero Alpini, Boris Karloff and Steve Landesberg.  On this day in 1765, the people of Frederick County, MD refused to pay England’s Stamp Tax, in 1863 a patent was granted for a process of making color photographs and in 1964 the Beatles released “I Feel Fine” and “She’s a Woman”.  In Japan it is Labor Day, in Maryland it is Repudiation Day and this Thursday it will be Thanksgiving in the US.

In the past, I have discussed Thanksgiving and given a history of how it became the holiday we have today.  I thought I would give some more history of the day for those who are interested.  For those who are not, you can skip ahead to the part about Australian spokesmen.  Anyway, for those who are interested, read on.
In September 1620, a small ship called the Mayflower left Plymouth, England, carrying 102 passengers—an assortment of religious separatists seeking a new home where they could freely practice their faith and other individuals lured by the promise of prosperity and land ownership in the New World. After a treacherous and uncomfortable crossing that lasted 66 days, they dropped anchor near the tip of Cape Cod, far north of their intended destination at the mouth of the Hudson River (see, Columbus is not the only one who got lost).

Throughout that first brutal winter, most of the colonists remained on board the ship, where they suffered from exposure, scurvy and outbreaks of contagious disease. Only half of the Mayflower’s original passengers and crew lived to see their first New England spring. In March, the remaining settlers moved ashore, where they received an astonishing visit from an Abenaki Indian who greeted them in English. Several days later, he returned with another Native American, Squanto, a member of the Pawtuxet tribe who had been kidnapped by an English sea captain and sold into slavery before escaping to London and returning to his homeland on an exploratory expedition. He helped the settlers forge an alliance with the Wampanoag.

In November 1621, after the Pilgrims’ first corn harvest proved successful, Governor William Bradford organized a celebratory feast and invited a group of the fledgling colony’s Native American allies, including the Wampanoag chief Massasoit. Now remembered as American’s “first Thanksgiving”, the festival lasted for three days. While no record exists of the historic banquet’s exact menu, the Wampanoag guests arrived bearing five deer.  I have also seen information that claims lobster and swans were also part of the menu.  Because the Pilgrims had no oven and the Mayflower’s sugar supply had dwindled by the fall of 1621, the meal did not feature pies, cakes or other desserts, which have become a hallmark of contemporary celebrations.

Let’s talk turkey for a minute. Turkeys have run wild through the United States since long before Pilgrim days. There’s even a fairly detailed fossil record of early turkey ancestors in states from Virginia to California. The Mesoamerican peoples of present day Mexico were the first to domesticate the bird, and that culinary legacy lasts until today.  Mexican cuisine is the one type of food in the world that prominently features turkey in many of its recipes. Turkey moles are especially popular in Oaxaca, with chocolate and pumpkin seeds adding a luscious flavor to the meat.  So this year maybe try something Mexican with those leftovers.

If you decided to skip ahead, this is the place where you should pick up reading.  Have you noticed that we seem to be unable to provide American spokesmen for commercials and TV shows?  We have Australian spokesmen for various products, there are shows on the cooking channels that have Australian chefs hosting and, to be honest, it puzzles me.  I find it difficult to believe that not one male in the US is capable of selling OxyClean.   Apparently, after Billy Mays passed away, we had to go all the way to Australia to get his replacement.  If I had known they were that desperate, I would have offered to give it a try.  Perhaps all the out-of-work American spokesmen should go to the land down under for jobs.  They must be short since all of theirs are coming here.  This is not a major issue and I am pretty sure the president will not be addressing it as part of his immigration policy, but I thought I should point it out.

As I mentioned last week, we had been on vacation in California.  For those of you who have not been out there, let me assure you that they drive as badly as people do on the east coast, maybe even worse.  When we were traveling down Interstate 5, the speed limit was 70.  Yes, 70!  And yet, that was not good enough for some drivers.  What made it exciting was that they would zoom up behind you, close enough so that you could see if the driver had trimmed his nose hairs recently, and then they would yank the steering wheel to the left, get into the outside lane and then pass your car.  Once by you, they would yank the wheel to the right and get back into the lane you were in.  

A couple times, a car would race up, change lanes, pass you, get back in your lane and then slow down.   I was never able to completely understand that.  I figured that maybe they did not realize how fast they were going and slowed down when they saw that they were at 80.  Or maybe they did not like riding behind a white car (our rental was white).  Then they would recover and zoom off to pass the next car.  It was an adventure, to be sure.  Couple that with being on a totally unfamiliar road with only the annoying voice on Google maps giving directions and you have quite a trip.

So this week our fact tells us that every citizen of Kentucky is required by law to take a bath at least once a year.  Thank goodness they have all those horses there, too,  so they have something to blame the smell on.

At this time I would like to wish everyone a very Happy Thanksgiving.  May your day be filled with happiness, good food, family, football and naps with your pants unbuttoned.  Happy Thanksgiving!

Today is Sunday, November 16 and there are only 11 days until Thanksgiving.  You should start thawing your turkey now so that you will be able to get the turkey parts bag out of the bird in time.  On this day we remember the birthdays of Tiberius Cesar, Burgess Meredith and Chinua Achebe.  Today, in 1676 the first colonial prison was organized in Nantucket, Massachusetts, in 1914 the Federal Reserve System formally opened and in 1959 “Sound of Music” opened on Broadway.  In Oklahoma it is Admission Day and tomorrow starts National Children’s Book Week here in the US.

As you may have read, last week I took a break.  I was on vacation with the lovely Elaine, my son and daughter-in-law and our two grandsons.  At the time, we were in San Francisco.  I hope no one was too upset by the fact that I did not publish.  I don’t do that often and I was sure you wouldn’t mind.

As I said, we were on vacation.  We spent a couple days in San Francisco.  We saw all the sights, including Fisherman’s Wharf, Lombard Street (and yes we walked up the crooked part [and paid the price for the hike]), Ghirardelli Square, Muir Woods and walked up hills that we would not have walked if we thought it through.  When we arrived at Ghirardelli Square it was lunch time so we ate – at the Sundae Bar.  Yes, our lunch that day consisted of ice cream sundaes.  If you have never done something like that, I highly recommend it.  We had a great view of the Golden Gate Bridge from our hotel room, we were close to everything and if it wasn’t close, the public transit system was easy to access right by our hotel.

After leaving San Francisco, we drove down to Santa Cruz, stopping at the boardwalk there to see the Pacific Ocean, and then on to Burbank.  The next day we took the Warner Bros. studio tour.  That was very interesting and it gave us a new perspective on the way movies and TV shows are done.  We also got to go on the sound stage where “Two Broke Girls” is taped.  From there we went to downtown Hollywood and walked around doing the whole tourist thing.  We went to Grauman’s Chinese Theater and saw all the hand and footprints of the stars, we saw the stars on the Walk of Fame and saw a red carpet that was set for a film premier that evening.  I even walked on the carpet for a couple steps before a security person glared at me and made me get off.

Our final couple days were spent in Anaheim, at Disneyland.  The whole trip was great, but the Disneyland part was special for several reasons.  First because the lovely Elaine and I had never been there.  Second because we were there with “the kids” and that made it a lot more fun.  The final reason was because I spent my 65^th birthday with my family, in Disneyland.  No, I did not make a big deal out of it.  I did not get the birthday mouse ears, I did not get the shirt that said “Birthday Boy”, I did not get the Birthday Boy sash or any of the other stuff that was available.  I simply had a great time as an incognito birthday person.

The whole trip was great!  My daughter-in-law did a fantastic job planning everything, making the reservations, getting our flights set up, etc.  We were excited to be on the trip and very happy to have been included in their plans.   On our own, if we even went out there, the lovely Elaine and I would probably not have done the Hollywood part of the trip.  I am glad we had the opportunity.

That being said, I want to spend some time talking about the sights in Disneyland.  Aside from the obvious fun of just being there, it was a people-watcher’s heaven.  I am amazed at the number of adults who were walking around dressed in some form of Disney character.  I am not talking about people who work there; I am talking about people just visiting.  I could not get over the women walking around in red skirts and white blouses, trying to look like Minnie Mouse.  Some of them were amusing; some of them were cute; some of them were just a little too large to carry it off well.  A couple women looked more like a blimp advertising Disneyland.

I saw one family that all had matching Disney shirts and were wearing Mickey ears.  The parents were wearing ears that were not meant for adults and had them perched on the back of their heads like beanies.  They were using the elastic strap to keep them in place and the straps were digging into their skin.  The father and mother were having a great time and you could tell that they thought they were really cool.  The kids, a young girl and two boys, looked like they would rather have been sold into slavery than endure the agony they were suffering.

I could not believe the number of adult women walking around with some type of mouse ears on.  I am not talking about mothers of little kids.  I am talking about groups of two or three women wearing fancy glittery, feathered mouse ears.  These were on plastic straps that went over the head, but were still more for young girls.  I saw couples with bride and groom ears – the groom had ears with a little top hat in between and the bride had a little veil.  There were people with ears that lit up and changed colors, ears that were geared toward various Disney characters, ears that were decorated for Christmas and on and on.  There were people walking around with animal tails hanging behind them, people wearing all kinds of Disney shirts, caps, hats and all sorts of apparel.  It takes all kinds of people to make the world go ‘round and apparently they all have to go through Disneyland at some point.

This week our fact tells us that Dr. Seuss pronounced his name “Soyce”.  What a shame that the man could not even pronounce his own name correctly.

Taking a break.  Talk to you next week.

Today is Sunday, November 2 and there are only nine days until my birthday, so there is still time to get gifts and cards, in case you were worried.  This is the natal anniversary of Daniel Boone, Burt Lancaster and Giuseppe Sinopoli.  On this day in 1783, General Washington bid farewell to his army, in 1947 Howard Hughes’ “Spruce Goose” flew for the first (and last) time and in 1962 JFK announced that the Cuban missile bases were being dismantled.  In Israel it is Balfour Declaration Day, in North and South Dakota it is Admission Day and in Venezuela it is Memorial Day.

As I am sure you are all aware, Halloween was this past Friday.  As I have in the past, I thought I would shine some light on this day.  Today’s Halloween customs are thought to have been influenced by folk customs and beliefs from Celtic-speaking countries.  Historians exploring the origins of Halloween noted that while some folklorists have detected its origins in the Roman feast of Pomona, the goddess of fruits and seeds, it is more typically linked to the Celtic festival of Samhain, which comes from the Old Irish for “summer’s end.”

Samhain (pronounced SAH-win) was celebrated in Ireland, Scotland and the Isle of Man.  It was held on or about October 31 and marked the end of the harvest season and the beginning of winter, or the “dark half” of the year.  It was believed that the spirits could more easily come into our world and were particularly active at this time of year.  It was felt that the spirits needed to be appeased to ensure that the people and livestock survived the winter.

In modern Ireland, Scotland and Wales, the festival included mumming and guising.  This involved people going from house to house in costume, usually reciting verses or songs in exchange for food.  Wearing costumes at Halloween spread to England in the 20^th century, as did the custom of playing pranks.  The “traditional” illumination for pranksters out on the night was provided by turnips, hollowed out to act as lanterns and often carved with grotesque faces to represent spirits or goblins.

Fast forward to present day and we find that we have raised Halloween to an art form.  We now have pumpkin carving kits that include designs and directions that enable us to go far beyond what I was used to doing when I was a kid. By the way, I hate to use that phrase.  My brothers and I used to laugh and moan when my father would start out a dissertation by saying that.  It meant that we were going to hear some story about when he was young and pumpkins hadn’t been invented yet, or when he had to make a costume out of a sheet that he couldn’t get dirty because he had to put it back on his bed when he came home.  Of course that was back before they even created candy corn and … but I digress.

As I was saying, we have managed to take this whole event over the top.  The lovely Elaine and I went to see the Halloween Parade at my younger grandson’s school on Friday.  It was great, actually.  We saw football players, zombies, super heroes and all kinds of interesting costumes – and that was just the parents!  Seriously!  Some parents came to see this 20 to 30 minute parade in costume.  C’mon, Really!!  You couldn’t let your child enjoy that moment in the spotlight without trying to steal some of his or her thunder?  The lovely Elaine and I went as loving grandparents and we enjoyed our grandson enjoying himself.  The kids had a lot of fun and the costumes were great.  They all walked along smiling and waving to everyone watching and the teachers were also in thematic costumes, representing the medical profession.  

After the show was over we took care of a couple other responsibilities and then headed home.  We wanted to be home before it got dark because we did not want to take a chance on flattening a little Trick-or-Treater while we were driving.  Also, we had purchased a bag of candy and we wanted to distribute as much of that as possible so that we could avoid eating the leftovers “because we didn’t want to see it all go to waste.”  The main reason was that it was Friday and that meant Margarita Night.  Anyway, it was fun to have the kids come to the door, ring the bell, say Trick or Treat and then open their bag for our donation to the sugar high that will carry them well into November.  I kept telling the lovely Elaine that I wanted to answer the door by flinging it open, yelling, “Get out of here you grubby little beggars!” and then slamming the door in their faces, but she said I couldn’t.  I thought it would be amusing.  Apparently I was alone on that.

This week our fact tells us that Dr. Kellogg introduced Kellogg’s Corn Flakes in hopes that it would reduce masturbation.  I read this fact several times and I have to be honest – I do not see the connection!  Maybe it’s me.  Maybe I should have eaten corn flakes when I was younger.  I do not see how eating corn flakes would have the effect that Dr. Kellogg hoped for.  Realistically, was the problem that rampant that it required inventing cereals that would stop it? Was he only concerned about males?  Did it have the result he hoped for?  How would he know?  It would seem to me that it has not completely eradicated the problem because they are still producing corn flakes.  

Well, have a nice week, eat your corn flakes, grab your socks and I will talk to you again soon.