It is Sunday, September 14 and there are only 47 days until Halloween.  You had better get your decorations now while they are on clearance and before the Christmas stuff is put out.  Today we celebrate the birthdays of Ivan Pavlov, Clayton Moore and Jon “Bowser” Bauman.  On this day in 1716 the first lighthouse in the US, in Boston, was lit, in 1814 Francis Scott Key was inspired to write “The Star-Spangled Banner” and in 1956 the first prefrontal lobotomy was performed, in Washington, DC. Today Nicaragua remembers the Battle of San Jacinto, Pakistan observes Jamat Ul-Wida and it is National Anthem Day in the US.

Today marks the 200^th anniversary of “The Star-Spangled Banner.”  The words were written by Francis Scott Key, an attorney sent to negotiate with the British for the release of American hostages.  The British agreed, but Key and the others had to wait until after the bombing of Fort McHenry to return to shore.

The lyrics came from Key’s poem “Defence of Fort M’Henry.”  The poem was set to the tune of a popular British song – “The Anacreontic Song” which had also become popular in the US.  It was renamed “The Star-Spangled Banner.”  Although the song has four verses, only the first is generally sung.  It was recognized for official use by the Navy in 1889, by President Woodrow Wilson in 1916 and was officially made the national anthem by a congressional resolution on March 3, 1931.

It is interesting to note that Key was not only an attorney, but also an amateur poet.  According to historian Marc Leepson, who wrote the first modern biography of Key, “He was an amateur poet, but not just any poet – he was a bad amateur poet.”  Key also never wrote a song in his life because, as his family described him, he was tone-deaf.  So now you have some background on our national anthem.  Be sure to take time out from your busy schedule to sing it.  Try to get all the words correct.

Now on to other things.  This past week, I went for a sleep study.  For those of you who are wondering, a sleep study is done for people who have sleep issues, most often sleep apnea.  When I had my first one done a number of years ago, it was determined that I was not breathing more than I was breathing during the night.  As a result I started using a CPAP machine.  CPAP stands for Continuous Positive Airway Pressure.  This machine increase air pressure in your throat so that the airway doesn’t collapse when you breathe in.  It stops snoring and allows for better sleep.

I used the CPAP machine for a number of years and then found that I needed something more.  Another study showed that I needed to switch to BPAP machine, which provides varying pressure when breathing.  Without going into more detail, let me just say that that machine worked for a time, but recently I began to find it was not doing the job completely.  As a result, I went for the most recent study.

So, here I am in a nearby hospital in their sleep lab at 9:45 PM.  I am not sure how all this is going to work.  I normally go to bed around 1:30 AM and get up around 8:30.  They want to get me wired up and in bed by around 10 or 11.  They have told me that they will wake me by 6 AM.  Seriously?  To make things worse, the pre-study material they sent me told me that I could not have coffee after noon.  As I said earlier, I usually go to bed much later than they were planning.  I also usually have my evening cup of coffee around 8:30.  This did not bode well.

I got there at the scheduled time, changed into my sleeping attire (I don’t really have sleeping attire, but I brought shorts and a T-shirt so as not to upset the technician) and sat to wait for the technician.  She came in and started a process that took some 40 minutes to complete.  This consisted of numerous spots all over my head, neck, back and legs being cleaned with alcoholic pads, then having wires attached using some kind of adhesive gel and then tape to hold them in place.  All these wires were then attached to a box that had a strap on it.  Then strap was so that I could carry the box like a purse when I used the bathroom, which I did.

When I finished and was washing my hands, I happened to look at myself in the mirror.  If you have ever been to a beach where people walk along and offer to bead your hair you will understand what I looked like, only weirder.  I had around 18 wires streaming from my head and forehead down to the box I had hanging from my shoulder, along with the ones from other parts of my body.  I looked like a science project that wasn’t finished yet, but did not look like it was going well.  I walked back to the bed and the technician took my “purse” and hooked it into the system.  So now I am lying on the bed with all these wires coming off of me and feeding into the box.  In addition, I have the tube and mask from the BPAP machine strapped on and air blowing into my nose.  The technician says, “Okay, just relax and get comfortable.  I will talk to you soon to do some testing and then you can go to sleep.”

She comes over the speaker by the bed, has me go through some short tests and then the room goes dark and she says sleep well.  I know I slept, but am not really sure for how long.  I woke up twice during the night, but don’t know why.  All of a sudden I hear, “Good morning, it’s 6 AM.  Let me do a few short tests before you get up.”  She does the tests and then turns on the lights, which seem bright enough to light up Met Life Stadium.  She comes in and removes all the wires, leaving little dabs of adhesive all over me, especially on my head.  You have not seen bed head until you see it stuck into position by that goop.  Fortunately, it was early enough that I got home without scaring anyone.  I hope that I don’t have to do that study again anytime soon.

This week our fact tells us that Calvin Coolidge is the only presidential candidate ever to make a campaign stop in Intercourse, PA.  He said he went there to assure people that he was not f’ing around.  He really wanted to be president.  Not really, but it would be a great story if he did.