Another week has passed and we are back again.  It is Sunday, February 16.  There are only 312 days until Christmas, so start shopping now and avoid the rush.  Don’t say that I didn’t warn you!  Today we recognize the birthdays of Heinrich Barth, Johann Strauss and LeVar Burton.  Today, in 600, Pope Gregory the Great decreed that saying “God bless you” is the correct response to a sneeze, in 1741 Benjamin Franklin’s General Magazine began publishing and in 1968 the country’s first 911 phone system went into service in Haleyville, AL.  It is Independence Day in Lithuania and tomorrow is Presidents’ Day in the US.

There are a couple issues that I wish to address today.  The first one is about Presidents’ Day.  I have said this before and I will say it again.  Please stop with the commercials that have George Washington and Abraham Lincoln selling us cars, furniture, jewelry, food, etc., especially the cartoon versions of them.  That’s all – just stop!  The other thing is if Presidents’ Day was created to honor presidents and combine the days into one day off, specifically Washington and Lincoln, why do government offices also take off for Lincoln’s birthday?  Just wondering.

Next I would like to talk about why we say “God bless you” when someone sneezes.  We don’t say it when someone coughs, blows their nose or burps, so why when they sneeze?  The response was first said by Pope Gregory during a bubonic plague epidemic.  As I mentioned earlier, he made it official in the year 600.

The response originated from ancient superstitions. People believed that a sneeze caused the soul to escape the body through the nose.  Others believed that evil spirits used it as an opportunity to enter the body. Saying God bless you was a way of preventing either of those from happening.  There was also the misconception that the heart momentarily stopped during a sneeze and saying “God bless you” was a way of welcoming the person back to life.  In later years it was believed that a sneeze preceded illness and “God bless you” was to wish you good health and to ward off the illness.

We now know that sneezing is a reflex action and can be the sign of a cold or allergy.  It can also be provoked by being outside in the sunlight or from smelling a strong odor.  Still, we persist in the custom of saying “bless you” mainly out of habit and common courtesy.  There.  Now you know more than you probably wanted about the use of the phrase after a sneeze.

Moving along to another issue, let me just say that the big snow storm the other day was not my fault.  I am being blamed for all the snow we have had this season because I bought a new snow blower that could handle the larger piles of snow.  The lovely Elaine has said that it is my fault because I “had to have a new toy to play with.”  I know I have said this a number of times, but it still applies – put back the moon rocks!  That is what is causing all this precipitation, not my snow blower.  I will say; however, that I am glad I have it since we are getting all this snow.

Scientists claim that our weather problems are caused by global warming, but when the temperature is sitting at 20 I do not see a whole lot of warming going on.  The last storm had not even melted yet, which would indicate that, even with the sun being out, it was not that warm.  Now another one has piled on top of that.  Thank God for global warming or we would be stuck in the middle of the next ice age by now.

The other issue I have, and again I am repeating myself, is why they have to name the storms and, more importantly, why the names they are using?  This most recent storm was called Pax.  Really?  That was the best they could do?  Why can’t we just say that another storm has come?  I still have to go out and use my new snow blower whether it has a name or not.  The best part was when the Weather Channel announced that Pax had officially become a Nor’easter.  When that happens do we stop using the name?  I have a name that I use for each one – PITA.

Totally off the subject of snow, I would like to make an observation regarding couples and sex on TV.  If you watch the movies or the shows, you may have noticed something that I find puzzling.  A couple goes out to dinner.  They have a nice meal, some wine, a dessert that was “to die for” (I’ll discuss that phrase and others another time) and then they go home.  Based on their conversation during dinner, you know what is coming.  As soon as they get in the house, they are kissing and undressing and heading toward the bedroom.

Is that realistic?  When the lovely Elaine and I go out for dinner, the first thing I want to do when I get home is go to the bathroom.  We also want to just sit for a while and let dinner “settle.”  There are also the food-caused body emissions that are likely to occur that can spoil the mood in a rush.  As far as the kissing and undressing part is concerned, forget it.  One or both of us would probably fall down if we tried to do them at the same time.  Moving toward the bedroom too?  Forget it.  Our bedroom is on the second floor!  Our night would end up with at least one of us in the ER.

And then they get up the next morning, roll over, start kissing and off they go again.  I will say two words – morning breath!  Give me time to use the bathroom and rinse my mouth and, yeah, maybe, but not as soon as I wake up.  And frankly, I think we would both prefer coffee first.

This week our fact tells us that a “quidnunc” is a person who is eager to know the latest news and gossip.  I wonder if there is an app for that?  Oh right, it is called a newspaper.

One other thing and then we are done for this week – God bless you, regardless of the body function.