Today is Sunday, April 29 and there are only 240 days until Christmas.  Time to start getting those cards written out and addressed.  Today we remember the birthdays of Oliver Ellsworth, William Randolph Hearst and Dale Earnhardt.  On this day in 1429 Joan of Arc led Orleans, France to victory over the English, in 1852 the first edition of Peter Roget’s Thesaurus was published and in 1975 US Forces pulled out of Vietnam. In Japan it is Hirohito’s Birthday and in the US it is National Peace Rose Day, National Shrimp Scampi Day and National Zipper Day.

Some time ago I heard someone mention the fact that the poem Humpty Dumpty does not say that Humpty was an egg, yet he is always depicted as such.  I have let this run around in my head for some time and recently mentioned it to Barbara.  She immediately went to her best friend, Siri, to get the lowdown.  Here is what we discovered.

As a character and literary allusion, he has appeared or been referred to in a large number of works of literature and popular culture, particularly Lewis Carroll’s Through the Looking Glass in which he is described as an egg.  In 1996, the website of the Colchester tourist board attributed the origin of the rhyme to a cannon recorded as used from the church of St Mary-at-the-Wall by the Royalist defenders in the siege of 1648.  In 1648, Colchester was a walled town with a castle and several churches and was protected by the city wall. The story given was that a large cannon, which the website claimed was colloquially called Humpty Dumpty, was strategically placed on the wall. A shot from a Parliamentary cannon succeeded in damaging the wall beneath Humpty Dumpty which caused the cannon to tumble to the ground. The Royalists (or Cavaliers, "all the King's men") attempted to raise Humpty Dumpty on to another part of the wall, but the cannon was so heavy that "All the King's horses and all the King's men couldn't put Humpty together again".

Humpty Dumpty has become a popular nursery rhyme and has been used as a literary allusion many times, including Robert Penn Warren’s All the King’s Men and Paul Auster’s novel City of Glass.  It has also been used as a common motif in popular music, including Hank Thompson’s “Humpty Dumpty Heart”, Aretha Franklin’s “All the King’s Horses” and Tori Amos’s “Humpty Dumpty”.  However, to go back to the original premise there is nothing in the rhyme which indicated that it was an egg.  Make of all that what you will.  Enough about Humpty.

I have been trying to work on some outdoor projects to make the gardens around the house look nicer, but am having some issues.  First, I have found that certain evergreens are a favorite food for deer.  I have one bush that has been completely destroyed up to the top foot or so of the bush.  Apparently the deer can’t get up that high.  I have noticed that this bush is a favorite of the deer and that a number of houses have the same problem.  All of the bushes have been eaten as far up as the deer can get, leaving some very interesting looking evergreens in their wake.  I am having mine removed and replaced with something else.

Last fall we planted a number of daffodil bulbs.  Most of them have come up, but some critter dug some of them up and just left them lying on the ground.  You could almost hear the animal thinking, “Hmm, what do we have here?  Oh, daffodils.  I don’t like them” and then spitting them out.  There have also been a couple nice ground cover plants I got that some animal decided to shred apart and leave lying in the beds as a warning that they were around.  I have done some research and have been unable to find anything about juvenile delinquent animals that simply destroy plants for the sake of it.  I will let you know if I come up with anything.

I have several perennials that I planted only to discover that they decided to be annuals and not come back.  I had four lavender plants that have been around for a couple years that decided to go away this year, too.  I am beginning to think I am developing a black thumb.  When I put it in the ground it thinks it is being buried, not planted.  I keep hoping, but I think that there is some kind of Machiavellian plot designed by the stores selling these plants to convince me that I am doing something wrong so that I will keep going back to buy more plants.  Does that sound paranoid?  Maybe I should just cover the beds in sand and seashells and go with a beach theme.

This week our fact tells us that in Alaska it is against the law to look at a moose from an airplane.  So many questions.  How would someone know that you are looking at a moose?  How do you know it is a moose and not an elk?  What if the moose is under some trees and you just happen to look down and don’t even know it is there?  Why is this a problem in the first place?  I really think there needs to be a place where I can go to find out the reasoning behind these crazy laws.  I have tried to find explanations, but so far I have not been successful.  I will let you know if and when I do.

Once again, I see each week that people in foreign countries have accessed this blog.  I would love to hear how you came across it and what you think.  Please comment and let me know.  For all the rest of you, share this link with your friends.  You should not have to suffer these inanities alone.  Thank you!

Today is Sunday, April 22 and there are only 203 days until my birthday.  Remember it is never too early to start shopping.  Feel  free to contact me for suggestions.  Today we remember the birthdays of Henry Clay, Vladimir Nabokov and Ryan Stiles.  On this day in 687 BC the Chinese recorded a meteor shower in Lyra, in 1823 RJ Tyers patented roller skates and in 1969 the first human eye transplant was performed.  In Brazil it is Discovery Day, in Oklahoma it is Oklahoma Day, in Spain it is Queen Isabella Day and in the US it is National Girl Scout Leader’s Day and National Jelly Bean Day.

The big news is that Barbara and I got married this past week in a small, quiet ceremony in Newport, Rhode Island.  Initially we had not intended to go that route, but after much discussion we realized we would not be able to put something together that would allow us to include both our families and friends in one place.  We decided that it would be simpler to “elope” and then just have parties to celebrate.

We left New Jersey on Monday in a blowing rain storm.  It was coming down so hard that every time we crossed a bridge I looked to see if Noah was on his way out to sea.  We got there and took care of getting the marriage license set up.  The day of the event started out nicely.  There was some sun and clouds, but it was good.  We spent some time touring one of the mansions, did some shopping and then went to the Newport Winery.  While at the winery, we did a tasting.  An interesting sidelight was that our friend Janet and Barbara did some matchmaking.  There was a nice young lady next to us who appeared to be interested in the guy pouring the wines.  Janet and Barbara convinced the girl to leave her name and phone number and then gave it to the guy and encouraged him to call.  Who knows?  Maybe they will get married in Newport!  

As we got closer to the time for the ceremony, it got cloudier and windier and colder.  The ceremony took place in a nice park down on the harbor.  We had planned on wearing jeans and our Tommy Bahama shirts.  We ultimately did, but you couldn’t really see the shirts because we kept our jackets on.  It was a nice ceremony and the person performing it did not waste a lot of time.  He was as cold as we were.  We went out for a nice dinner and then back to our hotel.  I am sure everyone was thinking that we were having an evening of marital bliss.  In reality, we were sitting stretched out in chairs, watching TV, letting dinner settle and trying not to make body noises.

On another front, I have been noticing a new trend that I am curious about.  What is it with guys not shaving?  Almost every celebrity looks like he has about three or four days growth on his face.  It is not a beard, yet, just a scruffy look that seems to be a requirement for males lately.  I generally shave every day.  Sometimes I let it go for a day or two, at the most, but then I need to shave.  Scruffy beards are a lot like Velcro.  Things stick to them.  When you are eating and use a napkin, parts of it stay in your beard.  The same thing happens when you use a tissue.  You always want to be careful that you don’t have little bits of paper stuck to your face.

Then you have the guys who go overboard and grow long beards that could really stand a trim or a combing occasionally.  Do we really need to see what you had for your last couple meals in your facial hair?  Why is it that people do not worry about grooming anymore?  A guy gets up in the morning, rubs his head and then goes out without ever thinking about running a comb through his hair.  Maybe it is my upbringing or the time I spent in the service, but I make sure my hair is neat just to go out to pick up the newspaper in the driveway.  In some cases, men spend a great deal of time and money getting their hair to look like they just got up and didn’t care how they looked when they went out.  These trends are like so many others.  It is cool when a few people do it, but then everybody gets into the act and after a while they all start to look the same.  You know the trend is almost over when you start to see guys in their 60’s doing it.

That seems to happen a lot.  Young people start a trend and then they carry it with them as they get older.  Older people start to pick up on it and before you know it, everyone is doing it.  You see it often with guys in their 50’s wearing baseball caps backwards.  I have always wondered about why you would want to do that in the first place.  The purpose of the bill on the cap is to shade your eyes, not protect your neck from the sun.  Another trend you see more of lately is guys with their pants half way down their butts.  I have seen older guys doing that, but usually someone is chasing after them saying, “Grandpa, you forgot your belt again.  Pull your pants up before you fall.”

This week our fact tells us that, according to studies, men change their minds two to three times more than women.  Sure they do!  They are just trying to guess at what the woman wants them to think!

Today is Sunday, April 15 and there are only 176 days until National Fluffernutter Day, so stock up now before the rush starts.  Today we remember the birthdays of Leonardo da Vinci, Charles Willson Peale and Claudia Cardinale.  On this day in 1738 the bottle opener was invented, in 1878 Harley Procter introduced Ivory Soap and in 1957 Saturday mail delivery was restored after Congress gave the Post Office $41 million.  In Africa it is African Freedom Day and in the US it is National Glazed Spiral Ham Day, National Rubber Eraser Day and National Take a Wild Guess Day.

I want to take a few moments to talk about the use of superlatives in advertising.  I watched a fair amount of TV this past week while I suffered through a cold and allergies.  I saw an advertisement that announced that a product was the 2018 product of the year.  It is only April!  How could this be the product of the year when there are still eight months left?  Is there a rule that says all new products must come out by the end of March so that the best one can be selected and announced in April?  If someone comes up with a fantastic product in July, does it get pushed off until the next year?

Then, of course, there are the commercials touting movies that tell us a movie is the feel-good movie of the year or the one movie to see this year.  Again, it is only April.  I guess movie-goers will just be watching so so, grade B films the rest of the year.  I have seen some of the movies that have been praised as fantastic and wondered why they bothered spending money to make the film and have enjoyed films that were panned.  The thing that we need to keep in mind is that these reviews are the opinions of the people that see the movie.  That would be like me telling you that broccoli is no good and should not be eaten, just because I don’t like it and, as a result, you eliminating broccoli from your diet.  I think we would all be better off if we were allowed to make our own decisions on what is good and bad, based on what we like, not some person who writes an article in a newspaper or magazine.

I just want to rant on one particular commercial and then I will move on.  The commercial is one where they are trying to tell you how fast their product is.  To demonstrate this, they put a powerful speed boat in the swimming pool at a hotel.  The boat revs up and people are blown out of chairs and water is sprayed everywhere “because fast should be fast.”  There is nothing about that that says fast.  The tag line would be better if it was “because nonsensical should be nonsensical.”  That’s all.  Thank you for indulging me.

As I said I spent the past week dealing with a cold and allergies.  The problem with that is you are never sure what medications you should be taking.  I spent a fair amount of time looking at the various options we had in the house and reading what symptoms they covered.  I also checked to see if any of the meds would conflict.  I came up with a combination that seemed to work for me, but it caused me to spend a fair amount of time napping.  In itself, that is not a problem.  I am retired and have earned the right to nap whenever I feel the need.  When it became an issue was when I was watching a show on TV and suddenly realized that the show had completely changed the cast.  It was upsetting until I saw that it was also 90 minutes later and a different show.

Anyway, since I was feeling under the weather – now there is a statement you hear a lot, if I may digress.  This phrase means to be ailing or ill and possibly has nautical or seafaring origins.  One source I found says that in the old days, when a sailor was feeling seasick, "he was sent down below to help his recovery, under the deck and away from the weather."  Another source says that during the days when ships were powered by sail, the captain’s log documented everything that happened during the day.  As sickness could spread rapidly on a ship, there were often times where the number of sailors that were ill exceeded the space provided in the log to record their names.  During these times, the excess names of the sick were recorded in the next column, which was reserved for the weather conditions of the day. Thus, it was not unusual for an ill sailor to be listed "under the weather".

So there you have some more trivia that you can dazzle your friends with.  As I was saying, since I was ailing, I did not get out much.  Now that I am feeling better and the weather is starting to improve, sort of, I hope to get out and have adventures that I can share with you.

This week our fact tells us that beetles taste like apples, wasps like pine nuts and white worms like fried pork rinds.  I am not sure I want to know how they went about finding this out, but I do know I will be much more cautious about eating baked goods with apple flavoring in them.

Today is Sunday, April 8 and there are only 378 days until next Easter, which is when some people say you can eat the Peeps you got this year. Today we remember the birthdays of Lewis Morris, Sonja Henie and Julian Lennon.  On this day in 1766 the first fire escape – a wicker basket on a pulley and chain – was patented, in 1862 John D Lynde patented the aerosol dispenser and in 1952 President Harry Truman seized steel mills to prevent a strike.  In the US it is National Empanada Day and National Zoo Lovers Day.

I know that I have written about strange laws before, but I thought it would be an interesting topic to revisit, based on some of the facts I have been finding over the past few weeks.  So, here is a list, by state, of some of the stranger ones.  I thought that, with vacations coming, you might want to be aware of these.  Again, I wish someone would give the reason why some of these were necessary.  

Alabama – it is illegal to wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in church.

Alaska – it is illegal to wake a sleeping bear to take a photo (dumb, too).

Arizona – it is illegal for donkeys to sleep in bathtubs.

Arkansas – you cannot honk your horn near a sandwich shop after 9 PM.

California – a frog that dies during a frog-jumping contest cannot legally be eaten.

Colorado – it is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.

Connecticut –a pickle cannot be legally considered a pickle unless it bounces.

Delaware – residents are prohibited from selling dog or cat hair.

Florida – if an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a                      vehicle.

Georgia – it is illegal to keep an ice cream cone in your back pocket on Sundays.

Hawaii – coins are not allowed to be placed in one’s ears.

Idaho – it is illegal to give your sweetheart a box of chocolates weighing more than 50 pounds.

Illinois – it is legal for a minor to drink as long as he or she is enrolled in a culinary program.

Indiana – mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans.

Iowa – one armed piano players must, by law, perform for free.

Kansas – a poorly worded law states that if two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed.

Kentucky – one may not dye a duckling blue and offer it for sale unless more than six are for sale at once.

Louisiana – you can be fined $500 for sending a pizza order to someone’s house without his or her knowledge.

Maryland – it is a violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt and there is a $10 fine.

Maine – it is illegal to keep Christmas decorations up after January 14.

Massachusetts – it is illegal to own an explosive golf ball.

Michigan – it is illegal for women to cut their own hair without their husband’s permission.

Minnesota – a person may not cross state lines with a duck atop his or her head.

Mississippi – one may be fined up to $100 for using profane language in public.

Missouri – it is illegal to drive with an uncaged bear (again, dumb, too).

Montana – guiding sheep onto a railroad track with intent to injure the train is subject to a fine of up to $50,000 and up to five years in prison.

Nebraska – it is illegal for a mother to give her daughter a perm without a state license.

Nevada – it is illegal to drive a camel on the highway.

New Hampshire – as of 1973, it is illegal to carry away or collect seaweed at night.

New Jersey – it is against the law for a man to knit during the fishing season.

New Mexico – state officials ordered 400 words of sexually explicit material to be cut from Romeo and Juliet.

New York – slippers are not to be worn after 10 PM.

North Carolina – elephants may not be used to plow cotton fields.

North Dakota – it is illegal to lie down and fall asleep with your shoes on.

Ohio – it is illegal to get a fish drunk.

Oklahoma – it is illegal to wrestle a bear (and yet again, dumb, too).

Oregon – it is illegal to go hunting in a cemetery.

Pennsylvania – it is illegal to tell a fortune teller where to dig for buried treasure.

Rhode Island – biting off someone’s limb will result in 1 to 20 years in prison.

South Carolina – horses may not be kept in bathtubs.

South Dakota – it is illegal to sleep in a cheese factory.

Tennessee – it is illegal to share your Netflix password.

Texas – it is illegal to sell one’s eye.

Utah – it is illegal NOT to drink milk.

Vermont – women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.

Virginia – it is illegal to sell lettuce or peanut brittle on Sunday.

Washington – the harassing of Big Foot, Sasquatch or other undiscovered subspecies is a felony punishable by fine and/or imprisonment.

West Virginia – whistling underwater is illegal.

Wisconsin – it is illegal to serve butter substitutes in prison.

Wyoming – You may not take a picture of a rabbit from January to April without an official permit.

There are so many others, but I will do more of them another time.

Appropriately, this week our fact tells us that while minors in Kansas City, Missouri are not allowed to purchase cap pistols, they may; however, buy shotguns freely.  That is like the time we travelled with friends of ours to a Pennsylvania resort and our sons were not allowed to drive snowmobiles because of their age, but could go to the shooting range and fire an Uzi.